Three Great Tips to Make Others Feel More Important

by Michael Haberman on May 19, 2013 · 1 comment


As a manager or an HR professional it is often important to connect with employees as well as you can. Making people feel important is one good way to make that connection. Here are three great tips for making others feel important.

Tip #1Take Notes
These tips come from 7 Tips for Making Other People Feel Smart and Insightful
written by Gretchen Rubin. She said that one of the things she uses, and I have used it as well for a long time, is to take notes. I carry a small notebook with me or use my iPad. I would not use this as a recording device but as a memory jog for me at a later time. It would help in later conversations. But at the time you are doing it, as Gretchen notes, “the fact that I was taking notes made their remarks seem particularly insightful or valuable.”

Tip #2 Remark on something said
People feel more important if they know you are listening, really listening. One of the best ways you can demonstrate that you have truly listened to what they said is to remark on something they had said earlier in the conversation. Gretchen wrote her experience has been “This reference shows a person that you’re tracking and remembering their comments very closely.” By the way this is a particularly valuable skill for managers to have when conducting performance discussions. Engaging in active listening is a very important skill.

Tip #3 Note a person’s ability
People like to know that you have noticed their hard work or effective efforts. Gretchen mentions “…take note of evidence of their admirable qualities—just in a word or two.” People are gratified that you noticed they put some extra effort or demonstrated some skill.

If you exercise these three tips you may be surprised at the reaction you get from people. If you show that you feel they are important you in turn will be more important to them. This is very similar to something I read written by Dennis Waitley once. He said to be seen as being interesting it is important to be interested.

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{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

Bill Ramsey May 20, 2013 at 6:52 am

A few years ago, I began the habit of always carrying a pocket notebook. It might seem odd at first, when one pulls out a notebook to scribble notes. I’ve seen, however, that when I do, and ask, “Do you mind if I jot a few notes?” . . . people are always flattered.
–And “the shortest pencil is longer than the best memory.”

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